sze-fan's senseless scribblings

the window to my life.

WOW. this is my 100th post. LOL.

happy 100th post to my bloggie!!!

it's funny.
how i used to blog about happier things, random stuffs i did.
now i only have the mood to blog mostly when i need to express my negative feelings.
people change.
looks like some good changes actually did come with some bad effects. lol.

"when you get something, you also lose something else."
so true.

"It is better to take refuge in the Lord than to trust in man." Psalm 118:8

God is cutting away many support strings that I was depending on all these while.
I know He has His reasons. He shall be my anchor. :)

i have been thinking... about you...
why do you do the things you know you shouldn't?
why don't you set the barrier for yourself earlier?
why don't you heed my advice?
why don't the flaring signs go into your head?

why do you make me suffer along with you now?
should i blame you? or should i blame myself?

anyway, i will be a victor, not a victim.
maybe it is good that i asked after all.
then you wouldn't have to wait and keep doing the things that will bear any result.
maybe you would have been hurt deeper.
at least, you felt relieved after that.
thanks for teaching me to be more cautious.
i left my guard down against people who i thought was supposedly i'm safe against.
i should have listened to my parents.
(So, please listen to YOUR parents. though their advices may seem unnecessary or even unreasonable at first.)

though i suffer now, i trust that this will not last.
though i feel betrayed, i know that the best has yet to come.
i KNOW this will be for the better in the long term.


"Do not arouse or awaken love until it so desires." Songs of Solomon 2 : 7

I woke up late today, about 9 am.
After that, i went to my uncle's cafe and had breakfast.

When i came home, i saw two indian youths outside the houise door within the house compound.
I then asked them loudly what were they doing here.
Then they paused a while and took out an empty campap book and said that they wanted to sell it. They then immediately asked me if there were anyone else in the house.

And i replied sternly i am not interested in their business of selling empty campap books.
They left quickly after i turned down their offer.

When i wanted to open the door, i saw that there was a foreign and strange looking key in the keyhole.

Then only i realized, " ohhh... they wanted to break in." LOL.
And my cousin was sleeping still in the living hall, unaware of his surroundings. what a p*g :P
The shoe cabinet was opened widely, but apparently the shoes were below their "taste".
They also left a plastic bag filled with weird stuff like metallic balls, hooks, net and scissors.
And so i concluded, they may be fishermen who grew bored of fishing and wanted to invite themselves into other people's houses for a change? If not, it doesn't make sense.
I don't know how u can use metallic balls, hooks, net and scissors to break into houses.
The worst thing was, they said "thank you, aunty" before leaving -______-

Thank God for His protection. His grace is enough. I'm living on His promises everyday. :)
God bless! Have a fruiftul day ahead! :D

Matthew 11: 28-30

28 Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.
29 Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls.
30 For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.

He really spoke to me through this verse. Through someone else who showed me this verse and also when i did my devotion alone on that same day. Praise God!


Things happened so fast. So many miracles. God truly has His own perfect timing.
Shall elaborate further after exams :P
Learning to be disciplined and wait on Him.
Lots of distractions also came subsequently after those miracles but I thank God for peace.
The peace that surpasses all understanding.

My exams are on the 3rd, 4th , 6th and 9th November. (very packed schedule as you can see)
AYA's on the 8th November!
Will be going back penang on 22nd November :)

Pray for me yah!
All the best to others who'll also be having exams.
WIll uphold you guys in prayer too.

Abusive fellowships are often the most exciting Christian gatherings around
filled with dedicated, committed, enthusiastic leaders and members. Do
not let enthusiasm and sincerity be the basis for approval. More often than
not, abusive fellowships cannot be recognized by mere outward appearance. By
discrediting facts, the leaders of such gatherings control information.
Leaders may deny these practices -- or marginalize them in some way. It is
important to investigate any fellowship thoroughly.

Abusive fellowships often change the meaning of words. In these fellowships,
"unity" commonly means agreement with the leaders opinions. Members are
often told that they are "out of unity" when they disagree with the leaders'
opinions. Healthy fellowships understand that true unity means that

There is one body and one Spirit -- just as you were called to one hope when
you were called -- one Lord, one faith, one baptism; one God and Father of
all, who is over all and through all and in all. (Ephesians 4)

Every healthy fellowship will have disagreements, and yet be in unity in the
Biblical sense as brothers and sisters in Christ.

In healthy fellowships members commonly maintain friendships when friends
leave the group. Abusive fellowships tend to view almost everyone who leaves
as a backslider and they view most other Christians as not committed or
saved. Healthy fellowships do not consistently tell derogatory stories about
those who leave.

In healthy fellowships the leaders prove themselves to be trustworthy in
order to be trusted. In abusive fellowships the leaders must be trusted
because they are the leaders. To not trust them is to sin.

In healthy fellowships we are admonished to imitate the Christ-like virtues
seen in others. In abusive fellowships the leaders are imitated in many more
ways than just their virtues. In fact, members take on many of the personal
characteristics (personality) of the leaders in a manner that appears
unseemly. This is particularly true of those being groomed for "ministry."

In healthy fellowships commitment to the Lord Jesus Christ, and to Apostolic
teaching, is absolutely necessary. In abusive fellowships members must be
equally committed to the group and to its practices and peculiar beliefs.
Some even have members sign "covenant" documents, much like marriage vows.

In healthy fellowships we are exhorted to obey clear Biblical mandates. In
abusive fellowships we are exhorted (or pressured) to obey the leaders'
opinions --even when our conscience says "no."

In healthy fellowships the confession of sins and "bearing of one another's
burdens" is a personal matter that takes place in the context of a larger
"family" relationship with other Christians. In abusive fellowships sins are
exposed by (or to) leaders and pressure is often applied to confess to the

In healthy fellowships secrecy and independence in personal matters --
before God -- are acceptable as long as sins are confessed in private. In
abusive fellowships secrecy or independence in personal affairs are scorned,
and all areas of life are to be exposed -- even those that do not touch
moral issues.

In healthy fellowships we are encouraged to love and bless our enemies. In
abusive fellowships showing hatred for our enemies and speaking defamatory
of them is acceptable. And often the occasion for "rallying the troops."

Abusive leaders seldom practice this scripture:

"...when ridiculed, we bless; when persecuted, we endure; when slandered we
respond gently..." (1 Cor 4:12, 13)

Matt. 18:15
If your brother sins against you, go and show him his fault, just between
the two of you.

1 Timothy 5:19, 20
Do not entertain an accusation against an elder unless it is brought by two
or three witnesses. Those who sin are to be rebuked publicly, so that the
others may take warning.

In healthy fellowships Matthew 18:15 applies to every member without
distinction -- you are to go to your brother or sister alone -- while 1st
Timothy 5:19-20 (a stricter standard) applies to leaders. In abusive
fellowships Matthew 18:15 applies to leaders -- you are to deal with them
alone -- instead of 1st Timothy 5:19-20. These latter verses are often
ignored, thus preventing two or three from EVER bringing an accusation
against a leader in error.

Non-abusive leaders rebuke members only for grave public sins, as a last
resort (Matthew 18:17). Abusive leaders often publicly rebuke or ostracize
members who simply disagree with leaders' opinions. Usually vis-à-vis sermon illustrations or applications, etc.

Non-abusive leaders do not encourage people to leave the fellowships because
of differences of opinion. Abusive leaders often assume the right --
unilaterally -- to tell or encourage members who do not agree with leaders'
opinions to leave the fellowship.

Non-abusive leaders do not view members as "lacking spiritually" simply
because they do not participate in numerous fellowship activities. Abusive
leaders view as "spiritually lacking" those who fail to attend most all
their fellowship activities. Some even mandate the number of meetings
members MUST attend.

Non-abusive leaders do not discourage members from reading information
critical about the group. Abusive leaders often control negative information
about the group by either discrediting it or by dissuading members not to
read it.

Non-abusive leaders do not judge your hearts, but they leave that to God.
Abusive leaders constantly judge hearts, motives, and intents. They
basically assume -- rather, usurp -- the place of God.

Note: This has been adapted from the pamphlet Discerning A Healthy Church,
©1998 Control Techniques, Inc. For more information, or to obtain a copy of
the original, unedited version, they can be reached at:

Control Techniques, Inc.
P. O. Box 8021
Chattanooga, TN 37141-8021

i really dislike politics.

and it is happening everywhere.

even in places you least expect.

i just don't understand why are we dwelling on such petty things.

when there are greater things to be done.

what is your priority?

your authority? your fame? your power? your ego?

wake up! whatever happened to accountability and integrity?

pacific tsunami happened an hour ago. so many lost souls.

what are we doing? THINK!

the clock is ticking.


" God's purpose for the church is to reach out to others, not to be happy and comfortable just by 'doing church' every Sunday." - Pastor Kenneth

happy birthday to both my siblings!

my sister's brithday falls on the 11th sept while my brother's birthday is on 13th sept.
so i chose 12th sept to post this up. fair fair ma. :P

thank God for blessing me with them! ;)
I love them.


World Changers' Academy just ended. Datuk Tony Tiah (Founder of TA Enterprise) and Datuk Edward Ong (Founder of Sutera Harbour Resorts) came to speak.
inspiring and really eye-opening.
These are really people of faith! *respect*
So rich yet so humble.

God answers prayers!
my cousin who was very skeptical about Christianity and debated with me a lot, said that God may have been showing him signs of His existence!
i'm so excited about what God can do. :)

"In order to be a World Changer, you must first be a God chaser."

"The main obstacle of getting success is staying in our own comfort zones."

"Hearing God's voice is not a gift, it needs practice and depends on intimacy."

"Human's wisdom is foolishness in God's eyes."

washed two cars in two hours! woohhoo! *semangat* with the help of cousin.

it was already dark when we finished.

please remind me to take picture of my car tmr morning before i go uni!

because.. i kiam siap wanan save 2 bucks everyday and park at the free muddy car park area.

so have to take pic to prove that i actually did wash my car loh!

some ppl complained my car looks dirty TT (save water, cannot wash too often too *ahem* *excuses*)

thanks for cousin who helped.

I told him, "don't cry when you see my car tmr" :P

he even scrubbed the tyres lol.


"Your ministry is not your life.
Your life is your ministry."

I like this pic!

few ppl reaallly thought that this was a phone advert.

wenhao wanted to apply to be my manager. anyone else interested can apply and pay a minimum fee of RM87654667890 :P

btw i did not POSE for this pic. it was taken when i REALLY had to pick up a phone call in the midst of the photo shoot. I did not PURPOSELY wear diff clothes. Borrowed my cousin my shirt d ler..

I like the white background! :)

I like the fact that I looked like i was trying to ss but in fact, I was not XD


thank you for the breakfast (abelkengchengwai) and sandwiches (ccfoo aka puffer fish) and for helping me finsih one of the sandwiches (tty aka siao po).

thanks for all who went to cf yesterday. thanks for 'bei min' to me :P


"When Faith comes in, Wisdom has to step down."

"God can use a teachable spirit better than our talents."

first of all, wanna thank my friend for the ride back :)



he dreamt.

she felt led to pray.

we met.


(long while)

then back home safely.

God saved my life.

and i thank Him for His protection (miracle also)!



one day, i hope you will realize that what you thought was fate is actually not fate. but the hands of God working.

There was this two planets, Mars and Venus. Men came from Mars and women from Venus. Creatures on both planets built spaceships that enable them to travel and they finally met each other. They fell in love, were willing to accept all their differences and flaws.

Both men and women then migrated to live on a planet called Earth. The air on Earth was toxic. After a while, they started having expectations and demands on each other. The air has polluted their minds. Their love for each other was fading, tempers rose, impatience ruled. They took each other for granted. Their hatred for one another grew. Finally, they could not take more of each other and went back to their own planets.

After arriving at their own planets, the toxic air from Earth was exhausted. Their minds were finally cleared from its detrimental effects. They started to regret and lived very lonely lives after that.

there's news that there will be sightings of meteor rain in Malaysian skies early in the morning.

i am lazy to wait for it. lol. though it doesn't happen everyday.

i was hoping my friend could freeze the movements of the meteors for me through his photographs.

so i can still make wishes.

and get to make wishes whenever and wherever. *greedyyy* XD

"Life is an uncertainty but death is a certainty. Do you have any idea where you'll be going if there's no tomorrow?"

i was quiet.

now, i'm even quieter...

sorry to those whom i scared away lol. i just don't feel like myself lately.

i am michelle i am emo i am cool (lol uncle came cha luan while i was in library)

maybe God is teaching me to depend on Him more. not to depend so much on worldly help.

for He is the Rock on whom i can put my trust and hope. :) smile for myself lol

lost contact with the rest of the world.

feel so lonely.

PS: that ugly drawing is not mine =P
lol i am not so free still can go paint.
btw, the small black thing is supposed to be a phone.
actually not enuf time to make it look more matured lah.
3 assignments await me!! all due this week! WOOHOO~

yes.. i lost my phone!

my cousin's phone actually ><
mine was spoilt so i took his extra phone.
pray that i will be able to find it somehow.
if not have to buy him back one.
but thank God it's a lower end phone. not too expensive. =)
pray for me!

this is actually not about tic-tac-toe. haha.

give name for fun only. it's my 3rd post in a row! woohoo~

just wanna boast that i baked carrot cake with my aunty on saturday. cousin said it's nice but i think ok only. *mental reminder: need to put cream cheese on top next time*

today i made kiamhutauhukiamchaicarrottomatochicken soup. not bad for a first timer. but that's because my aunty helped lah. haih.

enuf updates for now. haven't started any assignment at all. sei lor. ><

my friends are too generous. lol.

just went back there holiday also got gifts. haha. i am very blessed. amen!

thank you all! but no need to trouble yourselves next time yeah ;) you are much appreciated! i just need your time and presence in my life is enough. haha. but birthday time then different lahh i won't mind one. =P haha kidding.

souvenirS from brunei by CC. sorry, just left this one. my cousin already finished the other chocs. lol. thx for the aussie milo too. very strong milky taste. i like the very cute tin most. hehe.

thanks to thomson for this wonderful book. am using it for my devotion now. btw he has curtsy handwriting, quite nice and neat for a guy lah.
thx to yivern for the jay chou's piano scores =)

A bookmark and adorable magnetic dog from my cousin Shin Yih. you might think he's very sweet and all but is just ganti balas for all the times he hit me and bullied me physically, mentally, emotionally. =P hahhaa. nolah, he's a good cousin just that sometimes too playful and hands itchy. i became his toy or more accurately, medium at which he can express his feelings at. (okay, i know this sounds wrong..) Anyway, i also became clever! i threatened him with chocolates (his greatest weakest) and also bannd him from touching my keyboard if he bullies me more than 3 times a day. (see, i am not so heartless, still give some allowances lol).

i said i miss tze hui. happy d? =P

my 3 weeks in penang were fantastic!

i was happy to meet my family members! became sis' tuition teacher *aiseh* and also bro's babysitter when mum was away for the hokkien camp. <3

thanks to those who made an effort to come meet me, sacrificed their sleeping time, got scolded by their parents for going out too much, brought me out kai kai and fetched me everywhere.

this time round, went out the most with felicia and thomson. thomson who had to sleep very late every night (as he is working night shifts) and wake up early to teman us. felicia too made time for me though her exams were just round the corner. so touched so touched! :)

i attended room 77! :D

i went to the men's fellowship badminton tournament. XD

congrats to kyan for passing both ielts and imu exams. got a free japanese meal. =P

i got to meet the loh wey fats and the big one. play badminton also so siao. they play till very tired (due to too much laughters) and had to sleep in the courts (which has no air ventilation at all) in the end. =.= yes, they are a crazy bunch of girls.

i went to yi wei's house and overnight. she can play better piano than me now ><>

yivern got dengue and went to visit her 2 times in the hospital as she was sleeping the first time we went visit. she was totally unaware of it. wanted to surprise her... went to queensbay and watched ice age 3 instead. very enjoyable, much better than the 1st and 2nd movie. oh ya, we brought her honey stars and yoghurt and got paper and pen from the nurses. left her a note and signed our names as 'santa clauses'. fun fun~ :P

i met miss lai when i was having family dinner in harvest in restaurant, celebrating parents' wedding anniversary. she kinda scolded me for not telling her. *aww..* shows that she still misses me. XD arranged to meet on friday but then her son was sick so have to meet her next round.

went for dim sum at balihai with church people. they were late as usual =P except for adrian and shir hoay. but considered quite good d. can reach at 8.45am. haha. i ate a lot :/ vivi cheh made me :( haha.

haih. tak jadi by starbucks bottle in penang. too lil choices lah. need to wait for summer edition.
just wish both my friends, wei kwong and colin, all the best in the land of the koalas :D take care there! come back more often lah.

there are still some people i didn't get to meet this time, hope i get to meet them next time round lah. don't ppk again ok! lol.

felt this holiday quite meaningful. got to know a few people better, became closer with them especially my cousin win nie, ee joo and thomson.

yivern came to my house and sent me off before i took bus back to KL ALONE. lol. got to play with her cute dog Theodore, first time got so near to a dog and carressed its fur. luckily it doesn't like to lick much.

some of my uni friends also came to visit penang. didn't manage to spend much time with them as transportation was a problem but still, got to bring them to mizzi for dinner. got to know some of them better although we had been in the same classes for more than a year =P nice bunch of people.

PS: sorry if i missed out anything. tell me okay? =)

been coughing for more than 2 weeks already. (but thank God no flu XP)
i'm safe, don't need to keep a distance away from me.
been trying many different kinds of medicine, from chinese to western, almost 6 different medicines? =__=

yayy i had the chance to try a cough syrup that is kiwi in flavour! very sweet!
me likey 875456789876678685566789867 times more than the yucky, ewwy, horrible, despicable normal brown coloured cough syrup! (though i had to finish one bottle, me feeling pukey even thinking about it ><)

family came over for 5 days. they gave me a lot of motivation, made me very happy, and can eat a lot GOOD EXPENSIVE FOOD =P
a lot of motivtion lah i tell you.. except the motivation to study TT
cousin working now, nobody to teman me study at home *sob* *self-pity*
scared of studying alone lah, something disturbing happened yesterday even when i was with my sis. *ughhhhhhh* feel like vomitting again.

yayy family made cheese tarts yesterday after a good homecooked bak kut teh. =)
then me and cousin been making cheese cakes, we have already made strawberry and oreo ones.
successful! can teach my mum d next time. lol.

me need to concentrate on studies now. NEED TO! MUST!
kinda regret for not preparing earlier. and now can't really find the mood to study. *pfttt*
study mooodddd.... come backkk!! i miss youu too long already! :(

(red font for more sense of urgency)

we do things. we don't think. we regret. we live with the consequences.

to a certain someone, thanks for being so gracious. it was always me hurting you. yet you kept forgiving and kept getting hurt somemore. thanks for always being there for me. now i regret. it's too late i guess. maybe i will not get to see you for a very very long time. take care. and may you have a good life. God bless!

and yes, i will miss you. a lot.

Who am I?

That the Eyes that see my sin

Would look on me with love

And watch me rise again

Who am I?

That the Voice that calm the sea,

Would call out through the rain,

And calm the storm in me.



I am a flower quickly fading,

Here today and gone tomorrow.

A wave tossed in the ocean,

A vapor in the wind.

Still You hear me when I'm calling,

Lord You catch me when I'm falling,

You told me who I am.

I am Yours.

-Who Am I?- by Casting Crowns

.. and hope to die.

sorry a million billion trillion times for the unfeelingness of me.

sorry for some things, sorry for the little things, sorry for everything.

i went over border with this unfunny 'joke' of mine.

sorry if it caused you much distress.

hope all things will be well with you.

where the hell did i left my brains? ><


the trip was unplanned. totally. lol.

in the morning, i went for breakfast with my cousin at a noodles restaurant nearby. then we talked talked and talked. until a tow truck stopped right in front of our car we also didn't notice. we were sitting outside and yet we didn't realize. =.= next time cannot talk too much and must be more aware if we double park our car.

by the time we came to realization (which is after paying for our food) we saw that some MPSJ guys fastening some lock onto the car wheels behind their tow truck. we were shocked as this was ONLY the first time for both of us. haha. (one time enough also lah, wallet bleeding d lol)
the guy asked us to sit on the car and follow their truck all the way to puchong to pay for the fine.

i was kinda worried, sad and guilty at the same time. as it was me who talked so much until we became oblivious to our surroundings. anyway, my cousin just comforted me and said that what has happened has happened. just enjoy the process as we are going to pay so much for the experience. haha. 

therefore, a lil camwhoring resulted. =P

we looked at the sun in a whole different angle *exaggerating* XD but it was pretty and kinda amazing view. like how the sun broke through the thick patches of dark clouds. how everything down here looks so bright, we don't even notice the dark clouds. (please ignore my crapping, just pretending to be artistic =P)

yayy. long time since i camwhored XD

my happy-go-lucky favourite cousin! =) i enjoy sticking around with him.


lied down so nobody can see me from outside. kinda embarassing. hahhaa.

reclaiming the car in puchong.

had a fun and exciting time. experiences like this doesn't come cheap ya know *winks*

there's something to add. my cousin told me that his brother also got his car towed before. it was days before he knew that his car was held captive by the MPSJ. too bad he didn't get to enjoy the ride like we did and had to go worrying about the whereabouts of his car for days. haha!
and even funnier is the car was towed from in front of INTI to just like 2 buildings away. LOL. and he had to pay RM150. LOLOL. boh tatt. hahaa.  okay. i am evil =P

woohoo! i watched "fireproof" till about 2am this morning. hahha. coz i was not bothered with my genetics report (too lazy to change anything and do much more work) neither did i have to do sci. don't kill me please =P

surprisingly, i overslept =.= normally i do work whole night slept 3 hours also will not oversleep. sweat. somemore, i slept three times yesterday, had my afternoon nap and a nap at night before watching the movie. LOL. terrible ><

she is trapped in a fire. she's caught in the middle. too many valuable and precious things that she holds dear in that little hut. she has a difficult choice to make. now, she doesn't care if she gets scorched trying to save them. she will try salvaging the little pieces. even if it means her death. her death to her self

unforgiveness is like poison. it posions your soul and your mind. it clouds your thinking. and make you do unreasonable things. 

therefore, i too, must forgive. =)

yes, this week will be super crazy and hectic.

there is a microbiology test on tuesday which i have just started studying for.

and microbiology lab report which i have not started on due on wednesday.

and another biochemistry assignment which i have no idea of what it is all about.

God bless me.

well, i know that by the end of friday, i will just heave a huge sigh of relief and say, "it's just like any other weeks." =)

i pray for peace. and joy. and guidance. and wisdom. and divine intervention (for my aunt too).


there is someone whom i am very grateful to, but at the same time feel very apologetic to her.

sorry i made you buy the chicken and kept it so long in the freezer and forced you to bring it back to KL. i am deeply sorry. sorry for being so dense. haha.

anyway, jiayou to you too! we can make it through this week, just like any other weeks. haha. maybe we'll come out like zombies but nevermind =P

okay. i officially owe you a java chip. bring you to starbucks next time okayy. and mcD ice cream also. hahhaa. (sun bian help another person pay his debts XD)

Tan Tee Yee, thanks for everything, including your patience. =) *muax*


There is also a someone else who is sad, blur and lost these days, although i don't know what it is about, but i sincerely hope she'll be up and about soon. take care ya. =)

Last but not least, i hope bea will do well in her exams this term as she worked REALLY hard for it. lol. she amazes me with her determination and hard work. all the best dear. =)


i surrender ALL to Him. =) yes, i notice this (=)) is everywhere LOL

Few days ago, i just found out from my friends how scary i was before they get to know me. =.=

they say i proud wor. say i look scary, serious and fierce. too cool. too quiet. LOL WTHE.

ehhh... actually i am definitely not proud loh!(you can ask my friends) haih so misunderstood =(.

actually, i'm very shy and don't really dare to talk to strangers, much less approach someone to get to know the person >< ishhh ="">

how i wish i can get plastic surgery. make myself look less scary, less quiet and EVERYTHING! lol wthe. maybe should just carve a smile on my face to look friendly like joker's. hahhaa.

*shudders* ><

anyway the plastic surgery stuff was all just a joke lah. not even considering it! so painful!


oh yeah! i saw REAL SNOW FLAKES!!! two days ago in monash KL! hahha. for those who didn't trust me and look, rugilah you all coz no need buy so expensive air ticket to US also can see snow flakes hehhee. sam tong or not?! =P

Sorry for the late post. I must say that I'm very blessed with generous people around me. THANKS!!! <3 you all =)

my first FIRST CLASS international mail from siao po =)

my multipurpose card (4 greetings : Birthday, Christmas, New Year, Chinese New Year) haha.

yay. sea coral fan! ;)

Meet Mitch, my favourite snowman all the way from US, also from siao po.

He went to San Francisco but couldn't get me the 'I Love SF' shirt, but it's okay. I wanna go get it with them next time.
hint: SF are my initials.

hmm... ;D

Ahhh.. my first feminine purse (LOL) from siao po again.

I like the price tag. XOXO.

Merci chocolates all the way from Brunei, which is finishing fast (cousin kept sneaking them away from the fridge TT) Thanks CC! and eclipse chewing gums (in my favourite spearmint flavour)

A cute mug from Kelly. DO take care in Australia yeahh. =D Thanks for giving me your mm seh tak mug ><

Belated birthday present from dear Tze Hui.

Another belated birthday present (my new baby!) from Shanq Yeet and Shin Yih. cost them a fortune TT.

*sigh* what did I do to deserve them?

i'm disappointed.

my sixth sense proved me right. although i wished it to be the other way.
it's better if had't known anything, i could just go wth the flow and not be so disappointed.
what did you say? a good leader should be a good follower? please practise what you preach.
can you act rationally and not be blinded by your own emotions?
do you think for others? well, sure.. you (still) look good on the outside (to those who have no idea). i followed you blindly together with many others who 'worship' you.
well, what more can i say?
there's nothing i can do to change anything.
anyway, i'll still submit to the leadership.

do not ask me about this matter. it's off-limits. lol thanks for respecting my privacy.

Thank you Lord for putting such an impossible person in my life path.
So stubborn, egoistic and hypocryptic,
but through this, You taught me how to be patient and forgiving.
It even showed me how patient You were with me all these while,
for I am not much better than that person,
and the thought of You having to face the disappoinments caused by ALL the ones You love shatters me.
I thank you that Your grace is always sufficient.
And help me, Lord, not to hurt you anymore.
Grant me the strength to endure, wisdom to overcome.

Celebrated V day with family, we drove all the way up to Batu Feringghi, right to where my parents' first dating place was, the very special place where all the love began (their first dating place) in Lone Pine.

That's half of my body on the hammock, very comfortable. didn't want to go down the beach (dirty shoes).Lone Pine, taken while lying on the hammock still.

Four people (no prize for guessing who they are) admiring the skies and parachute.

A farther view.

The fruit of their love =)

I am single and very happy. =D
"The joy of intimacy is the reward of commitment" - Joshua Harris

The first few days (or should i say week) was very borin in Island Hospital. They wouldn't let me do anything initially because all the things are quite serious and there should not be any errors in the results lah (meaning VERY SERIOUS WAN LO IF MAKE MISTAKE) so i go kacau a few ppl, sms them non-stop when i'm bored lah. THANKS FOR ALL OF YOU WHO ENTERTAINED ME! XD if not, i don't know how i'm able to survive loh *shudders*

Well, my very cheeky cousin who normally hits me a lot (playfully lah) and of course, i hit him back. Hard. =P He suddenly send me a very *ahem* touching sms, so of course i have to put it here loh.

*Please ignore some wrong grammar, I would like to keep it as original as possible*

"When you have to wake up early to work when all others are sleeping soundly,
Be happy because somone already woke up (or haven't sleep TT) waiting to wish you a good morning. XP

When your work is bored, don't worry, someone will be eagerly waiting to chat wit you =P.

When your live get tough, don't be sad cuz there are 2 ears that always open willingly for you =)

But if you want money, you might not see me anywhere anymore. Wakakaka XD (kidding)

Wish to see you soon!"

anyway, i chose to post this up first because i lazy to think of things to write, this one copy paste only mah! hehe jk.

(i miss them both TT)

sounds cool right? lol. actually it's not a real job lah, student attachment with island hopsital. will be touching ppl's urine, stool, pus and a lot a lot of bacteria. so excited! (really?) lol.

today was my first day there. to be truthful, quite boring lah coz i only got to observe the pros doing their stuff and watch from 9am to 3pm.. thank God for smses if not i don't know how to survive those 5 hours with nothing to do (need to minus one hour for lunch).

well, hope i will benefit a lot and learn much more stuff during my 2 months of work. will be woking 6 days a week lah, sien. no more tiao ka at home, watching movies and playing badminton. sob. but one thing's for sure, i think i would slim down lo (coz only one hour of lunch).

i wish me all the best! =) and blessed 2009 to all of you!

i neeeeeeeeeeed to thank those who wished me (through blog esp. siao po who wrote super duper long and cheong hei-ly, sms, e-mail, card, frenster, facebook or snail mail) and gave me presents on my birthday. I wannnnt you to know that you are very very much appreciated! THANK YOU!
*imaginary big hugs and kisses*