tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-77283555333121109412024-03-14T13:02:19.504+08:00sze-fan's senseless scribblingsthe window to my life.sze-fanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02978918361311989175noreply@blogger.comBlogger119125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7728355533312110941.post-6414295742266688482015-08-18T18:32:00.001+08:002015-08-18T18:32:32.958+08:00sometimessometimes I just wish I didn't have to do it.<br />
sometimes I just wish I wasn't involved at all.<br />
to be free. to not have to worry. to not have to carry it alone.<br />
this is just that kind of time.<br />
<br />
Help me God! Give me strength! Help me to look beyond the flaws of humans to see Your purpose in doing all <i>these</i>.sze-fanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02978918361311989175noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7728355533312110941.post-64448966117074277762015-06-20T23:37:00.001+08:002015-06-20T23:37:15.260+08:00wonderwondering how one wrong can overwrite the many rights.<br />
self-centered human nature.<br />
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teach me how to be more like You Jesus. teach me how to love even when I am hurt and disappointed.sze-fanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02978918361311989175noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7728355533312110941.post-22392900164294319842014-10-14T00:09:00.000+08:002014-10-14T00:09:00.952+08:00the bus stop incidentyeah, so I got into a stranger's car and sat so comfortably at the back seat until my supposed "friend" turned around and I discovered he wasn't my friend. and the whole time, my friend was in the car in front witnessing the whole thing. epic. and someone posted on the monash confession page, must be one of my mischievous friend, i will get you. *evil laughs*sze-fanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02978918361311989175noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7728355533312110941.post-71606946769858669222014-09-13T08:07:00.001+08:002014-09-13T08:07:26.509+08:00weird dreamokay.. so I was so super tired that I didn't even bother online-ing for last few days and just fell asleep.<br />
I dreamt of scolding my cousins (poor them) for not wanting to fetch me home when I was outside stranded with my pyjamas. bizarre.<br />
<br />
sze-fanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02978918361311989175noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7728355533312110941.post-14049110428689392302014-08-12T19:28:00.001+08:002014-08-12T19:28:18.825+08:00again??<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Why does this have to happen again?</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">When you thought someone was so strong, they fell in the most unpredictable manner.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Why did you not learn from <i>her</i> mistakes?</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Why do you want to go through the heartache again?</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">Did you not see enough?</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">It pains me to have to see history repeat itself, to see <i>this</i> destroy someone I love. Again.</span><br />
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<b><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><span class="passage-display-bcv" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; box-sizing: border-box; display: inline; margin: 0px; padding-right: 10px;">2 Corinthians 6:14</span><span style="line-height: 24px;">Do not be unequally yoked together with unbelievers. For what fellowship has righteousness with lawlessness? And what communion has light with darkness?</span></span></b></div>
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<span class="text 2Cor-6-14" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; box-sizing: border-box;"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
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<span class="text 2Cor-6-14" style="-webkit-font-smoothing: antialiased; box-sizing: border-box;"><span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS, sans-serif;">I know this is a sensitive subject. Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying that we are better than <i>them</i>. But simply just by having different perception of things, different principles and different stands, I don't think it will work out for the best in the future. One day, when you look back, you will realize, what went wrong and how did you get yourself there. </span></span></div>
sze-fanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02978918361311989175noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7728355533312110941.post-64063186299241562772014-08-06T22:12:00.003+08:002014-08-06T22:13:19.366+08:00truth?Just watched some videos on Israel and Palestine. What a revelation.<br />
<br />
It just teaches me over and over again not to judge when we don't know the facts. It's so easy to base our 'knowledge' on just what others say or feel. We all have brains, use them. Don't be ignorant. The facts are out there, it's up to you whether you want to follow the crowd or you really know what you're supporting.<br />
<br />
<b>What everyone says doesn't make it true</b>. <i>Think again. </i>sze-fanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02978918361311989175noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7728355533312110941.post-18729313780360212072014-08-05T09:36:00.001+08:002014-08-05T09:36:23.591+08:00I'm back?Ola... yes! I'm back :P<br />
But don't know if the blog will suddenly go on hibernation mode for ages again?<br />
anyway, since the blogging trend is dying, there will be not many people who will be reading this. XD<br />
time to practice my writing again! I have been having mental verbal constipation trying to write a manuscript on my project. God, help me!sze-fanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02978918361311989175noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7728355533312110941.post-63424579026860560912012-01-07T03:15:00.005+08:002012-03-08T00:33:42.783+08:00Tread carefullyTo go, to stop or to back off?<div><b>Tread carefully</b>.</div><div>Some steps might bring you <i>there </i>but there are many which may betray you. </div><div>How did you end up here in the first place?</div>sze-fanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02978918361311989175noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7728355533312110941.post-84281647786173090542011-11-30T23:46:00.002+08:002011-11-30T23:53:37.008+08:00At the CrossroadsI am here. <div>I am afraid to budge. </div><div><br /></div><div>I want to get <i>there. </i></div><div>But actually, where is <i>there</i>?</div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div><div style="text-align: -webkit-auto;"><span class="Apple-style-span" ><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 12px; line-height: 18px;"><b>“I will instruct you and teach you in the way should go; I will guide you with My eye.” </b></span></span></div><div style="text-align: -webkit-auto;"><span class="Apple-style-span" ><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: 12px; line-height: 18px;"><b>-Psalm 32:8</b></span></span></div>sze-fanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02978918361311989175noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7728355533312110941.post-48937861609822693972011-11-28T22:32:00.001+08:002011-11-28T22:35:08.515+08:00Friendship and ComplicationIs it even possible? What would <i>You </i>want me to do? I need <i>You</i> to guide my steps.sze-fanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02978918361311989175noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7728355533312110941.post-54412421264107107482011-11-17T01:46:00.002+08:002011-11-17T01:48:16.236+08:00wordsSometimes the best thing you can say is nothing at all.sze-fanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02978918361311989175noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7728355533312110941.post-48007406901212338962011-06-14T21:31:00.002+08:002011-06-14T21:36:19.274+08:00the lightDid you know that the Light came before the sun? <div>The sun shines on both the righteous and the wicked.</div><div>There are sacrifices to be made when you want to live in the Light.</div><div>Lord, help me to live in the Light and please grant me the willingness to make the sacrifices required. <b>I need You.</b></div><div><br /></div><div>It's <i>full moon</i>. Again. :)</div><div><br /></div>sze-fanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02978918361311989175noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7728355533312110941.post-65931571666008585142011-06-12T00:45:00.001+08:002011-06-12T00:45:54.054+08:00Forgive<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 17px; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 10px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 10px; "><i><span class="Apple-style-span" >Forgiveness is not about trusting the person again or forgetting everything that happened. It's about letting go and letting God.</span></i></span>sze-fanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02978918361311989175noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7728355533312110941.post-62029344508685519292011-06-12T00:41:00.000+08:002011-06-12T00:42:57.289+08:00Left out?<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: rgb(67, 66, 65); font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; line-height: 17px; -webkit-border-horizontal-spacing: 10px; -webkit-border-vertical-spacing: 10px; "><p style="line-height: 17px; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 1.35em; margin-left: 0px; "><em style="line-height: 17px; font-style: italic; ">“Encourage anyone who feels left out, help all who are weak, and be patient with everyone.” </em>1 Thessalonians 5:14 (CEV)</p><p style="line-height: 17px; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 1.35em; margin-left: 0px; ">When you are feeling neglected, overlooked, or ignored, what is your natural reaction? It depends on your personality, but you will probably either want to withdraw and take the approach of “you ignore me and I’ll ignore you,” or you’ll seek out a way to get that person’s attention. Either way, it’s all about you.</p><p style="line-height: 17px; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 1.35em; margin-left: 0px; ">God wants you to choose a different reaction. With his controlled power, he wants you to make the gentle choice to focus on others. If you’re feeling neglected, chances are somebody else is feeling that way too, and you have the opportunity to do something for him or her because you can empathize.</p><p style="line-height: 17px; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 1.35em; margin-left: 0px; ">Finding someone to encourage will get you out of the downward spiral of self-pity; you are now looking out for others and seeking to make a difference in their lives.</p><p style="line-height: 17px; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 1.35em; margin-left: 0px; ">As today’s verse tells us, it’s important to look for someone who most other people wouldn’t encourage. A lot of people like to encourage or help powerful people because it might give them a leg up on something. But God wants us to <em style="line-height: 17px; font-style: italic; ">“encourage anyone who feels left out”</em> and <em style="line-height: 17px; font-style: italic; ">“help those who are weak”</em> (1 Thessalonians 5:14 CEV).</p><p style="line-height: 17px; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 1.35em; margin-left: 0px; ">Who do you need to encourage? Take a moment to consider someone you know who might be feeling neglected or overlooked. Maybe it’s somebody in your office, school or neighborhood.</p><p style="line-height: 17px; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 1.35em; margin-left: 0px; ">Then take some time to follow Hebrews 10:24 and <em style="line-height: 17px; font-style: italic; ">“think of ways to encourage one anther to outbursts of love and good deeds”</em> (NLT). Maybe write them a quick note or take them out to lunch.</p><p style="line-height: 17px; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 1.35em; margin-left: 0px; ">Those small acts have the power to change not only their lives, but yours as well. Instead of turning inward and allowing neglect to eat away at you, turn outward and use God’s power in your life to serve others. It’s ministry, it’s powerful, and it makes a difference.</p><p style="line-height: 17px; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 1.35em; margin-left: 0px; "><br /></p><p style="line-height: 17px; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 1.35em; margin-left: 0px; "><i>- So hard to do but yet so true.</i></p></span>sze-fanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02978918361311989175noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7728355533312110941.post-78914552043868989762011-02-11T23:38:00.001+08:002011-02-11T23:41:10.462+08:00ironywhy am i afraid to show that i care?<div>why is it so hard to do what i want to do at times?</div><div>I've rehearsed it so many times in my head but it just went wrong at the right time.</div><div><br /></div><div>I-R-O-N-Y.</div>sze-fanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02978918361311989175noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7728355533312110941.post-91819860974450491812010-06-25T16:50:00.002+08:002010-06-26T23:06:03.064+08:00tacky phrase<div>"I think you've got one of my ribs."</div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div>"I think one of your ribs belongs to me." <div><br /></div><div><br /></div>sze-fanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02978918361311989175noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7728355533312110941.post-88093562117105877622010-04-11T00:45:00.002+08:002010-04-11T00:49:33.118+08:00hold my handI no longer feel empty now, because you are holding my hand.<br />Accompanying me through times of pain, times of joy, times of stoning...<br /><br />.<br />.<br />.<br />.<br />.<br />.<br />.<br />.<br />.<br />.<br />.<br /><br />I love you, <span style="font-style: italic;">Bonia</span>! :P<br /><br /><br />-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------<br /><br />Holidays ending. Did not complete ANY work. shucks! :( *naikgila*sze-fanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02978918361311989175noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7728355533312110941.post-53491117127496009622010-03-23T11:37:00.005+08:002010-03-24T11:04:55.017+08:00lil bird<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg2vhyphenhyphen3WWI5kOgdOrgLWcwl7mNAbmTp_aP_hz4YXNWJ55HY9iLHqSh2iD73SDC1seQG8N6XME5_JPD_LDLwjKmK2F9jt3i-Wu1Flm-_27XmKLqUd0ZfkkDyuL8dnqVErn4sj7OqWtzUh7E/s1600-h/blog+lil+bird.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 400px; height: 316px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg2vhyphenhyphen3WWI5kOgdOrgLWcwl7mNAbmTp_aP_hz4YXNWJ55HY9iLHqSh2iD73SDC1seQG8N6XME5_JPD_LDLwjKmK2F9jt3i-Wu1Flm-_27XmKLqUd0ZfkkDyuL8dnqVErn4sj7OqWtzUh7E/s400/blog+lil+bird.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5451841477052541890" border="0" /></a><br />Was on the way to the library when i saw amira near the field, bending down like she's trying to find something under the bushes. Wanted to help her. so i kaypo-edly went over and asked what she was up to. She told me she was looking for worms to feed a pitiful-looking baby bird she saw underneath a tree. It got separated from its mother.<br /><br />In the end, she found a baby snail. She tried to make the baby bird eat it. But the baby thinks it doesn't look appetizing. Moreover, its beak can't really reach inside the shell. So, Amira wanted to scrape the meat out with a chopstick but I told her the chopstick is too fat to reach into the shell too.<br /><br />She then decided to scrape the snail meat out with her bare fingers. She took out a black long stringy thing from the shell and kind heartedly fed it to the lil bird who should be very hungry by then. The bird took some parts of it. After a few seconds later, Amira looked at me and said she hope the thing on her hands wasn't the snail poo.<br /><br />so cute-lah! :P<br /><br />*very amused*<br /><br /><br /><br />why do people try to keep something that willl fly away in the end?sze-fanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02978918361311989175noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7728355533312110941.post-18775612039479491762010-01-10T12:54:00.006+08:002010-01-10T23:20:09.962+08:00michelle... michelle...What is Michelle like? I shall allow u to peep into her (life) a bit.<br /><br />The other day, she went to Queensbay with her sister who wanted to go to the maxis centre for some reasons but didn't know where it was. Michelle wanted to go popular for other reasons too. So they both went to popular first. When Michelle was waiting to pay for stuff at the cashier, she asked her sister to go to the big directory in front of dave's deli to check where the maxis centre was. Her sister went out obediently and came back in less than 2 minutes to say that the place was just next to popular. *ahem*<br /><br />Soooooo, together they went to maxis. Michelle wanted to change her basic prepaid plan to youth club plan. She told the girl at the counter that she tried for almost 5 times but simply couldn't change her plan. She confirmed with the girl that she has more than 15 dollars credit as changing of prepaid plan requires a charge of 8 dollars. The girl asked for her full name, IC number, phone number and various details. Then, Michelle gave the girl the phone to help her with the process. The girl, after fidgeting with her phone for few minutes, looked up at her intently, then showed her the phone screen which stated, "Hotlink Youth Club. Balance: RM24.70"... She was also smiling very sweetly<br />:)<br /><br /><br />*embarassing* lolsze-fanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02978918361311989175noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7728355533312110941.post-71547886889080043442009-12-15T02:33:00.002+08:002009-12-15T02:39:47.244+08:00100th postWOW. this is my 100th post. LOL.<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">happy 100th post to my bloggie!!!</span><br /><br />it's funny.<br />how i used to blog about happier things, random stuffs i did.<br />now i only have the mood to blog mostly when i need to express my negative feelings.<br />people change.<br />looks like some good changes actually did come with some bad effects. lol.<br /><br />"<span style="font-style: italic;"><span style="color: rgb(204, 102, 204);">when you get something, you also lose something else</span>.</span>"<br />so true.sze-fanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02978918361311989175noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7728355533312110941.post-76090789713065044442009-12-09T00:48:00.002+08:002009-12-09T00:57:15.140+08:00the strings<span style="color: rgb(204, 102, 204);">"It is better to take refuge in the Lord than to trust in man." Psalm 118:8</span><br /><br />God is cutting away many support strings that I was depending on all these while.<br />I know He has His reasons. He shall be my anchor. :)sze-fanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02978918361311989175noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7728355533312110941.post-87743497668708235112009-11-13T16:05:00.002+08:002009-11-13T16:25:45.128+08:00victor, not a victim :)i have been thinking... about <em>you...</em><br />why do you do the things you know you shouldn't?<br />why don't you set the barrier for yourself earlier?<br />why don't you heed my advice?<br />why don't the flaring signs go into your head?<br /><br />why do you make me suffer along with you now?<br />should i blame you? or should i blame myself?<br />LOL.<br /><br />anyway, i will be a victor, not a victim.<br />maybe it is good that i asked after all.<br />then you wouldn't have to wait and keep doing the things that will bear any result.<br />maybe you would have been hurt deeper.<br /><em>at least, </em>you felt relieved after that.<br />thanks for teaching me to be more cautious.<br />i left my guard down against people who i <em>thought </em>was supposedly i'm safe against.<br />i should have listened to my parents.<br />(So, please listen to YOUR parents. though their advices may seem unnecessary or even unreasonable at first.)<br /><br />though i suffer now, i trust that <em>this</em> will not last.<br />though i feel betrayed, i know that the <em>best</em> has yet to come.<br />i <em>KNOW</em> this will be for the better in the long term.<br /><br />;)<br /><br /><br /><em><strong>"Do not arouse or awaken love until it so desires." Songs of Solomon 2 : 7</strong></em>sze-fanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02978918361311989175noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7728355533312110941.post-7202626993967330442009-10-28T09:56:00.003+08:002009-10-28T10:11:45.141+08:00An exciting morningI woke up late today, about 9 am.<br />After that, i went to my uncle's cafe and had breakfast.<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />When i came home, i saw two indian youths outside the houise door within the house compound.<br />I then asked them loudly what were they doing here.<br />Then they paused a while and took out an empty campap book and said that they wanted to sell it. They then immediately asked me if there were anyone else in the house.<br /><br /><br />And i replied sternly i am not interested in their business of selling empty campap books.<br />They left quickly after i turned down their offer.<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />When i wanted to open the door, i saw that there was a foreign and strange looking key in the keyhole.<br /><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5397466076285966146" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 400px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 300px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgz0KSnzyeBXd4CVSA7El-LuFl1GhY93iXhI8GbmvX8qRF_C1lyMdT6j3h2MMKgu_BSth8oFfaTuzYYdtksF6UZySzP079bN-cc_Y0-xwrFJ9ZHKyxH07WOa1YzMPVWy6Qrw5rdGdI6xS8/s400/IMG_8979.jpg" border="0" /><br /><br /><br /><br />Then only i realized, " ohhh... they wanted to break in." LOL.<br />And my cousin was sleeping still in the living hall, unaware of his surroundings. what a p*g :P<br />The shoe cabinet was opened widely, but apparently the shoes were below their "taste".<br />They also left a plastic bag filled with weird stuff like metallic balls, hooks, net and scissors.<br />And so i concluded, they may be fishermen who grew bored of fishing and wanted to invite themselves into other people's houses for a change? If not, it doesn't make sense.<br />I don't know how u can use metallic balls, hooks, net and scissors to break into houses.<br />The worst thing was, they said "thank you, aunty" before leaving -______-<br /><br />Thank God for His protection. His grace is enough. I'm living on His promises everyday. :)<br />God bless! Have a fruiftul day ahead! :Dsze-fanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02978918361311989175noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7728355533312110941.post-64472358572952957282009-10-27T17:01:00.002+08:002009-10-27T17:14:19.723+08:00ExamsssMatthew 11: 28-30<br /><br /><br /><em><span style="font-size:78%;">28 </span>Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.</em><br /><em><span style="font-size:78%;">29 </span>Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls.</em><br /><em><span style="font-size:78%;">30 </span>For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.</em><br /><br /><br />He really spoke to me through this verse. Through someone else who showed me this verse and also when i did my devotion alone on that same day. Praise God!<br /><br />-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------<br /><br /><br />Things happened so fast. So many miracles. God truly has His own perfect timing.<br />Shall elaborate further after exams :P<br />Learning to be disciplined and wait on Him.<br />Lots of distractions also came subsequently after those miracles but I thank God for peace.<br />The peace that surpasses all understanding.<br /><br />My exams are on the 3rd, 4th , 6th and 9th November. (very packed schedule as you can see)<br />AYA's on the 8th November!<br />Will be going back penang on 22nd November :)<br /><br />Pray for me yah!<br />All the best to others who'll also be having exams.<br />WIll uphold you guys in prayer too.sze-fanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02978918361311989175noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7728355533312110941.post-60436760614661939262009-10-08T21:05:00.002+08:002009-10-08T21:10:28.460+08:00Forwarded email: "How can I discern whether I am in a healthy or abusive fellowship?"<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Segoe UI', Tahoma, Verdana, Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 13px; color: rgb(68, 68, 68); "><pre style="white-space: normal; "><div style="text-align: justify;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'Courier New';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 14px;"><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0in;margin-bottom:.0001pt;line-height: normal;tab-stops:45.8pt 91.6pt 137.4pt 183.2pt 229.0pt 274.8pt 320.6pt 366.4pt 412.2pt 458.0pt 503.8pt 549.6pt 595.4pt 641.2pt 687.0pt 732.8pt"><span style="color: rgb(68, 68, 68); "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'lucida grande';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;">Abusive fellowships are often the most exciting Christian gatherings around<br />filled with dedicated, committed, enthusiastic leaders and members. Do<br />not let enthusiasm and sincerity be the basis for approval. More often than<br />not, abusive fellowships cannot be recognized by mere outward appearance. By<br />discrediting facts, the leaders of such gatherings control information.<br />Leaders may deny these practices -- or marginalize them in some way. It is<br />important to investigate any fellowship thoroughly.<br /><br />Abusive fellowships often change the meaning of words. In these fellowships,<br />"unity" commonly means agreement with the leaders opinions. Members are<br />often told that they are "out of unity" when they disagree with the leaders'<br />opinions. Healthy fellowships understand that true unity means that<br /><br />There is one body and one Spirit -- just as you were called to one hope when<br />you were called -- one Lord, one faith, one baptism; one God and Father of<br />all, who is over all and through all and in all. (Ephesians 4)<br /><br />Every healthy fellowship will have disagreements, and yet be in unity in the<br />Biblical sense as brothers and sisters in Christ.<br /><br />In healthy fellowships members commonly maintain friendships when friends<br />leave the group. Abusive fellowships tend to view almost everyone who leaves<br />as a backslider and they view most other Christians as not committed or<br />saved. Healthy fellowships do not consistently tell derogatory stories about<br />those who leave.<br /><br />In healthy fellowships the leaders prove themselves to be trustworthy in<br />order to be trusted. In abusive fellowships the leaders must be trusted<br />because they are the leaders. To not trust them is to sin.<br /><br />In healthy fellowships we are admonished to imitate the Christ-like virtues<br />seen in others. In abusive fellowships the leaders are imitated in many more<br />ways than just their virtues. In fact, members take on many of the personal<br />characteristics (personality) of the leaders in a manner that appears<br />unseemly. This is particularly true of those being groomed for "ministry."<br /><br /></span></span> <span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'lucida grande';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0in;margin-bottom:.0001pt;line-height: normal;tab-stops:45.8pt 91.6pt 137.4pt 183.2pt 229.0pt 274.8pt 320.6pt 366.4pt 412.2pt 458.0pt 503.8pt 549.6pt 595.4pt 641.2pt 687.0pt 732.8pt"><span style="color: rgb(68, 68, 68); "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'lucida grande';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;">In healthy fellowships commitment to the Lord Jesus Christ, and to Apostolic<br />teaching, is absolutely necessary. In abusive fellowships members must be<br />equally committed to the group and to its practices and peculiar beliefs.<br />Some even have members sign "covenant" documents, much like marriage vows.<br /><br />In healthy fellowships we are exhorted to obey clear Biblical mandates. In<br />abusive fellowships we are exhorted (or pressured) to obey the leaders'<br />opinions --even when our conscience says "no."<br /><br />In healthy fellowships the confession of sins and "bearing of one another's<br />burdens" is a personal matter that takes place in the context of a larger<br />"family" relationship with other Christians. In abusive fellowships sins are<br />exposed by (or to) leaders and pressure is often applied to confess to the<br />group.<br /><br />In healthy fellowships secrecy and independence in personal matters --<br />before God -- are acceptable as long as sins are confessed in private. In<br />abusive fellowships secrecy or independence in personal affairs are scorned,<br />and all areas of life are to be exposed -- even those that do not touch<br />moral issues.<br /><br />In healthy fellowships we are encouraged to love and bless our enemies. In<br />abusive fellowships showing hatred for our enemies and speaking defamatory<br />of them is acceptable. And often the occasion for "rallying the troops."<br /><br />Abusive leaders seldom practice this scripture:<br /><br />"...when ridiculed, we bless; when persecuted, we endure; when slandered we<br />respond gently..." (1 Cor 4:12, 13)<br /><br />Matt. 18:15<br />If your brother sins against you, go and show him his fault, just between<br />the two of you.<br /><br />1 Timothy 5:19, 20<br />Do not entertain an accusation against an elder unless it is brought by two<br />or three witnesses. Those who sin are to be rebuked publicly, so that the<br />others may take warning.<br /><br />In healthy fellowships Matthew 18:15 applies to every member without<br />distinction -- you are to go to your brother or sister alone -- while 1st<br />Timothy 5:19-20 (a stricter standard) applies to leaders. In abusive<br />fellowships Matthew 18:15 applies to leaders -- you are to deal with them<br />alone -- instead of 1st Timothy 5:19-20. These latter verses are often<br />ignored, thus preventing two or three from EVER bringing an accusation<br />against a leader in error.<br /><br />Non-abusive leaders rebuke members only for grave public sins, as a last<br />resort (Matthew 18:17). Abusive leaders often publicly rebuke or ostracize<br />members who simply disagree with leaders' opinions. Usually vis-à-vis sermon illustrations or applications, etc.<br /><br />Non-abusive leaders do not encourage people to leave the fellowships because<br />of differences of opinion. Abusive leaders often assume the right --<br />unilaterally -- to tell or encourage members who do not agree with leaders'<br />opinions to leave the fellowship.<br /><br />Non-abusive leaders do not view members as "lacking spiritually" simply<br />because they do not participate in numerous fellowship activities. Abusive<br />leaders view as "spiritually lacking" those who fail to attend most all<br />their fellowship activities. Some even mandate the number of meetings<br />members MUST attend.<br /><br /></span></span> <span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'lucida grande';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0in;margin-bottom:.0001pt;line-height: normal;tab-stops:45.8pt 91.6pt 137.4pt 183.2pt 229.0pt 274.8pt 320.6pt 366.4pt 412.2pt 458.0pt 503.8pt 549.6pt 595.4pt 641.2pt 687.0pt 732.8pt"><span style="color: rgb(68, 68, 68); "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'lucida grande';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;">Non-abusive leaders do not discourage members from reading information<br />critical about the group. Abusive leaders often control negative information<br />about the group by either discrediting it or by dissuading members not to<br />read it.<br /><br />Non-abusive leaders do not judge your hearts, but they leave that to God.<br />Abusive leaders constantly judge hearts, motives, and intents. They<br />basically assume -- rather, usurp -- the place of God.<br /> </span></span> </span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0in;margin-bottom:.0001pt;line-height: normal;tab-stops:45.8pt 91.6pt 137.4pt 183.2pt 229.0pt 274.8pt 320.6pt 366.4pt 412.2pt 458.0pt 503.8pt 549.6pt 595.4pt 641.2pt 687.0pt 732.8pt"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'lucida grande';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"><br /></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="margin-bottom:0in;margin-bottom:.0001pt;line-height: normal;tab-stops:45.8pt 91.6pt 137.4pt 183.2pt 229.0pt 274.8pt 320.6pt 366.4pt 412.2pt 458.0pt 503.8pt 549.6pt 595.4pt 641.2pt 687.0pt 732.8pt"><span style="color: rgb(68, 68, 68); "><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'lucida grande';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;">--------------------------------------------------------------<br /> Note: This has been adapted from the pamphlet Discerning A Healthy Church,<br /> ©1998 Control Techniques, Inc. For more information, or to obtain a copy of<br /> the original, unedited version, they can be reached at:<br /><br /> Control Techniques, Inc.<br /> P. O. Box 8021<br /> Chattanooga, TN 37141-8021</span></span> <span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'lucida grande';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"><o:p></o:p></span></span></span></p> <p class="MsoNormal"><o:p><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family:'lucida grande';"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: medium;"> </span></span></o:p></p></span></span></div></pre></span>sze-fanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02978918361311989175noreply@blogger.com3