sze-fan's senseless scribblings

the window to my life.

i have been thinking... about you...
why do you do the things you know you shouldn't?
why don't you set the barrier for yourself earlier?
why don't you heed my advice?
why don't the flaring signs go into your head?

why do you make me suffer along with you now?
should i blame you? or should i blame myself?

anyway, i will be a victor, not a victim.
maybe it is good that i asked after all.
then you wouldn't have to wait and keep doing the things that will bear any result.
maybe you would have been hurt deeper.
at least, you felt relieved after that.
thanks for teaching me to be more cautious.
i left my guard down against people who i thought was supposedly i'm safe against.
i should have listened to my parents.
(So, please listen to YOUR parents. though their advices may seem unnecessary or even unreasonable at first.)

though i suffer now, i trust that this will not last.
though i feel betrayed, i know that the best has yet to come.
i KNOW this will be for the better in the long term.


"Do not arouse or awaken love until it so desires." Songs of Solomon 2 : 7